"The Good Lord Above made whiskey so the Irish would never take over the world!"
-- Old Irish Proverb

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups:
alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and fat. -- Alex Levine

An Irishman is not drunk so long as he can hold on to
one blade of grass and not fall off the face of the earth.

To the raven her own cluck is white.

It's no use carrying an umbrella if your shoes are leaking.

There's an Old Irish Recipe for Longevity

Leave the table hungry.
Leave the bed sleepy.
Leave the tavern thirsty.

The reason the Irish are fighting each other is they have no worthy opponents.

There was never a scabby sheep in a flock that didn't like to have a comrade.

Irish Diplomacy:

The ability to tell a man to go to hell
So that he will look forward to making the trip.

Murphy's Law

Nothing is as easy as it looks.
Everything takes longer than you expect.
And if anything can go wrong,
It will be at the worst possible moment.

Get on your knees
And . . .
Thank God you're on your feet.

We cannot share a sorrow
If we haven't grieved a while.
Nor can we feel another's joy,
Until we've learned to smile.

Do not resent growing old . . .
Many are denied the privilege.

I Believe in the sun . . .
When it is not shining.
I believe in love . . .
Even when I feel it not.
I believe in God . . .
Even when he is silent.

Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others
Cannot help but keep some from themselves.

If you're lucky enough to be Irish . . .
You're lucky enough!

Another Irish Fact

There are only two kinds of people in the world:
The Irish and those who would like to be Irish!

Life is like a tea bag.
You never know how strong you are until you're in hot water.
Life is like a cup of tea.
It's how you make it.

You'll never plough a field by turning it over in your mind.

A scholar's ink lasts longer than a martyr's blood.

A silent mouth is musical.

A constant guest is never welcome.

Death is a poor man's best physician.

Have a mouth of ivy and a heart of holly.

No heat like that of shame.

How many mourn the want of possessions;
yet the strong, the brave, and the rich,
all go to the grave at last;
like the poor, and the emaciated, and the infant.

If the head cannot bear the glory of the crown, better be without it.

Conversation is the cure for every sorrow. Even contention is better than loneliness.

Have sense, patience, and self-restraint, and no mischief will come.

Reputation is more enduring than life.

Associate with the nobles, but be not cold to the poor and lowly.

The peacemaker is never in the way.

A short visit is best, and that not too often, even to the house of a friend.

True greatness knows gentleness.

Good fortune often abides with a fool.

The tree remains, but not the hand that planted it.

The lake is not encumbered by the swan;
nor the steed by the bridle;
nor the sheep by the wool;
nor the man by the soul that is in him.

No sorrow like the loss of friends.

Face the sun, but turn your back to the storm.

A meeting in the sun is lucky, and a burying in the rain.

A man with loud talk makes truth itself seem folly.

Better April showers than the breadth of the ocean in gold.

No pain like that of refusal.

Falling is easier than rising.

It is difficult to soothe the proud.

There is no joy without affliction.

Idleness is a fool's desire.

The older the fiddle the sweeter the tune.